Why am I different?

Kiara and her mother walked into my clinic one Monday morning. I wondered why this twelve-year-old adolescent had skipped school to come and see me. Kiara greeted me, took a seat and was very quiet as she looked around the room. I proceeded to enquire about what had brought them to my clinic.

Her mother told me that Kiara was one of a twin, and an excellent student. Recently her grades had started falling and so they had taken her for an eye test. The ophthalmologist had examined her thoroughly and concluded that she did not need any spectacles. His only finding was that she had a poorly controlled squint (strabismus) and had suggested that the family come and see me to determine if this was something that needed to be addressed.

I asked more details about the squint from Kiara’s mother. Kiara had not been born with squint. It was rarely seen as a toddler, only when she was tired or sleepy. It was like that for many years. Since when she turned ten, it was more noticeable, seen when she was looking at something far away like watching television or when she was daydreaming or even when she was excited and would recall her day in school.

I had my eyes on Kiara as the conversation proceeded and I did notice that her squint was quite visible. Mother said she started worrying when slowly Kiara became quieter and then her grades started slipping.

After completing her eye test, I turned to Kiara and asked her if her friends ask her about her squint or if someone had teased her at school. Tears welled up and she mutely nodded and started whimpering, not saying a word. I went over and sat next to her and asked her if I can hold her hand and she nodded. We then talked about how something was possible to correct her eye deviation, and she just said in a low voice ‘I am ready’.

Kiara underwent surgery for squint, uneventfully. At the final visit to see me, 4 weeks after surgery, the door flew open, and in entered a smiling youngster. She wished me and when I asked her how school was and about her twin brother, she talked nonstop for five whole minutes, also sharing about her upcoming vacation.

Squint (strabismus) has been shown in many studies to have a psychological impact on children and adults. The world perceives them as different and often will demonstrate biases and judge them. Studies have shown an improvement in their psychological profile and mental well being after undergoing treatment, often surgery, for this.

So, if you are a parent with a child who has a squint or a person who has a squint who feels the world looks at you differently and are bothered by it, know that something can be done to make things better.